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StartingOver_Pom
Starting Over

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pom





Registered: November 2010
Location: bangkok
Posts: 167
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Starting Over



Neill was not breastfed as a baby.


Back then, who knows how much I could have pocketed if I got a penny
everytime somebody gave me a you're-not-trying-hard-enough look.


My breast milk didn't come when Neill was born and for the whole first week
we pretty much starved him because I was so determined to breastfeed.
We really didn't have anything else prepared in case I couldn't do it.
I had read so much about the advantages of breastfeeding
and wouldn't give my son anything but the best.


Well, turned out I couldn't give him that.
I extended the hospital stay but in the end even the doctors and nurses gave up
(without really saying so) and suggested that he should be given full-on formula.
I couldn't even describe how much it hurt.


I know it's nobody's fault and it couldn't be helped. But sometimes I want to scream,
'Enough with the look and don't try to make me feel less of a mother because of it!'


I would have given anything though, to go back and start over with all the breastfeeding struggles.
But it just can't be done. That day when I gave Neill his first full bottle, I felt defeated.
Then I realised that I was holding on to my ego instead of his needs.


That day, we started over together.
I learned that being a mother doesn't only mean pushing for the best, but also accepting the truth.
And I hope Neill learned that eventhough it might not always work out in the end,
I'd fight tooth and nail to give him the best I possibly can every single time.



Credits:
Studio Doodelle's kit 'Anew'



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· Date: Sun December 5, 2010 · Views: 1,016
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sascedar


Registered: June 2008
Posts: 968
Sun December 5, 2010 5:34pm

this is just beautiful pom! i love the soft design, and your journalling is so raw and inspirational. I can relate to your journey and just wish everyone could accept that, for the most part, mums are doing their absolute best, and quit judging!

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Sarah http://i247.photobucket.com/albums/gg147/sascedar/onelittlebirdblinkie.gif http://i247.photobucket.com/albums/gg147/sascedar/blinkie03_09ct.gif http://i247.photobucket.com/albums/gg147/sascedar/3pp_blinkie_082511_150.gif
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biograffiti


Registered: September 2009
Location: Beautiful Utah!
Posts: 1,710
Sun December 5, 2010 5:46pm

WOW! Gorgeous and beautiful journaling!

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CONNECT [ link ] |[ link ] | [ link ] | [ link ] | [ link ] [ link ] [ link ]
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taxed4ever

Crazy about the "O"

Registered: November 2008
Posts: 21,393
Sun December 5, 2010 8:15pm

This is truly amazing... I love your journaling and can totally relate!! Wonderful work!

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http://ozone.oscraps.com/gallery/data/1217/Untitled-12.png
[ link ]
Siggie made with products by Maya de Groot http://i387.photobucket.com/albums/oo314/astorytime/Blinkies/Oscraps-CherryO.gif
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ViVre


Registered: November 2009
Location: netherlands
Posts: 17,861
Mon December 6, 2010 8:59am

wow, Pom, it hurts ...........
Thanks for sharing.
Love your page, love the truth!

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“When words become unclear, I shall focus with photographs. When images become inadequate, I shall be content with silence.” -Ansel Adams [ link ]
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Romy


Registered: January 2010
Location: California
Posts: 1,848
Wed December 8, 2010 7:27am

what a touching story!! and great page!

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MariaTrader


Registered: February 2008
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 2,565
Wed December 8, 2010 2:34pm

beautiful layout to match beautiful words. don't let any judgments from others make you feel like any less of a mother. do what you can and don't stress about the rest Wink

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Maria [ link ] http://www.mychalkboard.com/images/rrgsueoscraps.gif
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LaurieW

lOve the O!

Registered: March 2007
Posts: 20,529
Fri December 24, 2010 11:01am

amazing layout- powerful journaling- I was able to take my son home, but 2 weeks later he was diagnosed failure to thrive as he grew in length but not weight. He thrived on formula, too!

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http://i143.photobucket.com/albums/r145/LaurieWe/blinkies/OfficiallyObsessed.gif Creating for Maya de Groot Designs[ link ]
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EHStudios

I lOve Me Some O!

Registered: September 2009
Location: Smalltown Indiana
Posts: 19,474
Mon December 27, 2010 6:37am

Pom your journaling is perfection & so open! Love the lightly blended photo!!

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anneken


Registered: August 2008
Location: Belgium
Posts: 70
Thu September 15, 2011 9:38pm

So beautiful... and your journalling? Wooow, I totally love it....
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Sarahspeedy

Registered: August 2011
Location: Belgium
Posts: 258
Sat November 12, 2011 9:05am

I just saw your lo and I have to say, it touched me immediately. So sweet from the outside and also the inside. I can imagine what you were going through. But luckily, I could give my boys breastfeeding. With some difficulties in the beginning. But we made it through, luckily!
And I'm sure your boy got all the love he needed when he was a baby!
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